Faith From 9 to 5

Do you "go along to get along"?

Sunday's gospel reading was the parable of the "weeds among the wheat."  Christ told the disciples that the weeds are children of the "evil one" and the "good seed are the children of hte kingdom."

Weeds in a garden always seem to grow right up against the good plants and flowers. They can take over the space and overwhelm the good plants depriving them of water and light.

We're impacted by those we work with just as the plants are impacted by those they grow with. 

Working in such close quarters with people, in stressful conditions, trying to get things done on deadline can encourage us to just "go along to get along"...pretend we think those racial jokes are funny too...pretend it doesn't bother us when someone bullies others...pretend we're OK with the derogatory comments made about others...

But if we're really true to our faith and beliefs can we truly be OK with all of that or things like them?  Descartes said "To know what people really think, pay attention to what they do."  It's our actions that really demonstrate what we believe and what's important to us.  When we eat a donut while saying "boy, I wish I could lose weight" we're demonstrating that instant gratification is more important to us than losing weight.  When we allow others to make racial jokes in front of us we're demonstrating that we value "going along" rather than standing up for what's right in that moment.

I know this is a challenging situation.  I'm certainly guilty of this kind of thing myself...and I don't advocate you commit career suicide...but is there someway to protect yourself and let someone know you don't find their comments funny or their behavior appropriate?

When I worked in a cubicle in an open office my desk was near the coffee pot which was on top of the office refrigerator.  UGH.  You can imagine how many people would stick their head in and some would decide they could just stay and proceed to tell me all kinds of jokes I found mildly to very offensive.  I tried explaining I was very busy and had a deadline (always easy to blame stuff on work!).  I tried telling the person that those jokes made me uncomfortable in an open office (they actually would have made me uncomfortable anywhere).  Finally I went to my boss and asked to have the coffee pot and refrigerator moved.

As employees we really do have to find some way to get along with our coworkers in order to accomplish the organization's goals.  As people of faith we have to find some way of doing all of that in a way that's consistent with our faith, beliefs, and values.  It's one of the greatest challenges we face.

Do you say one thing and do another?

One of the scripture readings on Sunday was one of my favorite sections of Paul's letter to the Romans.  I think It's one place where he sounds so absolutely normal. 

In Romans 7:15-19 Paul discusses what the NRSV chapter heading calls "the inner conflict". Here's what he says:

15 I do not understand my own actions.  For I do not do what I want, but I do the very thing I hate.

16 Now if I do what I do not want, I agree that the law is good.

17 But in fact it is no longer I that do it, but sin that dwells within me.

18 for I know that nothing good dwells within me, that is, in my flesh.  I can will what is right, but I cannot do it.

19 For I do not do the good I want, but the evil I do not want is what I do.

This to me is one of the big mysteries of life and it applies in so many places of our lives.  For example, we SAY we want to lose weight yet we indulge in our favorite treats more often than we should and don't work out as often as we need to.  We say we want to save money yet we don't do it. 

We also say we're people of faith and that we believe in the teachings of Christ yet there are so many times when we don't follow the two great commandments...especially at work. 

There are so many times over the years that I've done something and then thought "now WHY did I do that?"

Whether it's peer pressure in the moment, our pride rearing it's ugly head, or lashing out in anger...it's so easy to allow our emotions to rule our heads and hearts.

I believe this issue is one of the great challenges we face as faithful people living in the world.  I don't have an easy answer except that we have to take every step we can to resist our impulse and to patiently reflect before we respond.

What do you think?

How welcoming are you?

Sunday's gospel reading at church was from Matthew 10:40-42 which is Christ's explanation that "Whoever welcomes you welcomes me, and whoever welcomes me welcomes the one who sent me."

The priest's sermon talked about our own personal welcoming behaviors at church and asked us to examine how welcoming we are to strangers...including the person who we see every week at church and don't know.

This got me thinking about welcoming behaviors at work. 

Remember what it was like when you were a new employee in the office?  You feel like the onion in a petunia patch (as my mom used to say).  You don't even know where the bathroom is let alone the unspoken important details about the place where you work and the people you work with.  You don't get what they're talking about...you don't get the inside jokes...you don't know who's who and how they fit in to the scheme of work or what role they play in the office.

You want to be liked and you want to like them but it's very hard to know what to do or say that won't make you look like you're trying too hard.

I've seen this happen even with employees who transfer from one department to another.  They may technically know the people they now work with but they don't know them in this knew role.

This is an opportunity for each of us to allow the light of Christ to shine through us and to go out of our way to be as welcoming as possible towards the new person. 

Here are some ideas:

Have a welcome breakfast for the new person.  (Why do we have going away parties?  Are we happy people are leaving?  Shouldn't we be celebrating their arrival?)

Ask questions about the person's work background...what they liked about their former job and what made them choose to apply with your company or department...what do they look forward to about their new job...and whatever other questions can help you get to know them. (Be cautious about asking personal questions...some people are uncomfortable with sharing that information too soon and in today's litigious society you should be hesitant about that stuff).

Have each person in the work group share information about themselves.  It would be great if each person could spend a few minutes alone with the new hire to discuss what they do and how that intersects with their new job.

Take time to introduce them to others around the company. (But don't overwhelm the with too much too soon.  It can be embarrassing for the person to admit later that they've forgotten names...which will certainly happen).

Have their works space ready with new office supplies and if it's possible have their new business cards ready or at least have blank ones prepared so they can write in their name without scratching out someone else's.

Tell them some of the unwritten things that help people fit in...like who likes to have someone knock on their office door or cube doorway before entering, etc.

While new hires certainly should work to fit in to their new surroundings it's important that the existing work group make extra effort to welcome the person and help them fit in.  Think about the things you wish had been done for you...or better yet...ask the person what you could do to help make the transition to their new job a good one.