Faith From 9 to 5

What do you do when a colleague has a serious illness?

Today I did something I've never done before and I pray I never have to do again. 

I wrote a friend's obituary.

My good friend, Stephanie, who I worked with and lived with, is losing her battle with cancer. Her husband called me to update me on her condition and he asked me if I'd write her obituary.  I did a draft of it today.

As much as it broke my heart to do it I'm also honored that she would want me to.

This got me to thinking though about what people do when their coworker has been diagnosed with a serious illness.  

I think that, like with anything, we think about how this issue will impact us as individuals. We also start thinking about our own health. Maybe we think about someone we know or knew who had the same diagnosis.  I remember when a friend of mine's dad died.  I felt badly for her of course but it brought back all the sadness I felt (and feel) when I lost my own dad.  I also felt terribly for her mother who had lost the love of her life.

During a time like this I think it probably makes sense to take some guidance from the person themselves. Do they give the impression they want to talk about it? Are they trying to ignore it?  Will their illness eventually impact the work group? It makes sense to deal with that openly and with as much compassion as possible.

If you work for a large company you may want to see what sort of support they offer.  Some companies have an Employee Assistance Program that can provide counseling and help working with the emotional issues. 

What about faith in this?  What do you do if the person doesn't appear to have any faith?  Do you share your faith with them? Do you invite them to church?

I'm asking these things because I truly would like to know your thoughts.  I don't know WHAT I'd do.  I know my friend isn't particularly religious but in her obituary I mentioned God...that I believe God will wipe away her tears.  I wrote that because I believe it's true and also because I know she'll read my draft or her husband will read it to her and I want to do what I can to ensure that she embraces God and Christ before her life slips away.

Please keep her in your prayers and share your thoughts with me. 

Avoid going from the frying pan into the fryer

One of the challenges of changing jobs in a tough market like this is the feeling of desperation that can come over you.  You might jump on any offer for fear that it's the only one you're going to get.

I'd rather not see you do that but only YOU can make that choice in the moment. I can tell you though that if you've got alarm bells going off telling you not to take the job you should listen to them.  If you feel you've GOT to take the job offered, start your job but keep searching.  Just be extra careful and quiet about it.

Here are some things to look for to judge the culture of the company and help you figure out if you're going to be happy there or not.

1.  What's the application experience like?  How are you treated as an applicant? Does the company take steps to acknowledge they've received your resume? Is their website full of useful information and easy to navigate or is it just full of fluff and useless, over-used statements like "our people are important to us." Yawn. When you're contacted by someone are you treated with courtesy and friendliness?  Do you get a rejection letter when you're not selected?  Everything you experience is communicating a message about the prospective company and if they mistreat you before you even START working there what will life be like once you're an insider?

2.  The interview experience.  Interviews are inherently stressful.  Do the various people you meet with make some attempt to make you comfortable?  I once interviewed with a hospital administrator on what was the hottest day of the year. She sat in front of me with a big glass of ice water.  She never offered me anything.  Did she have to? No.  But it would have conveyed she was a nice person.  The interview went downhill from there.  Do you interview with peers and colleagues from related departments? That tells you that teamwork is probably valued pretty highly.  Everything in the interview process is sending my messages too.  What are they telling you?

3.  What information do they share freely? You're going to every interview with questions and information you want to find out.  Ask some tough questions and see what information you get.  I interviewed with the CEO of a large casino hotel who was going on and on about how this place would have a tremendous focus on its employees.  I asked him to give me a couple of examples of how he was already putting a focus on employees and what did he mean by focus. He certainly didn't like the questions.

4.  What do you see when you're there?  Do you see people who look happy to be there or are they miserable?  Are the offices sterile or has some attempt been made by the employees to personalize their space?  Are clients or customers on property?  Do they look happy?  Is the property clean, well kept, and modern? If it's dumpy what does that tell you about the cheapskates who run the joint?   Check out the restrooms even if you don't need to use them. 

5.  What do you hear when you're there?  Do you hear people laughing? Is there a lot of conversation among the cubes?  Do you hear anything that tells you people are angry or tense?  What about the customers or clients that are there?

6.  What questions are you asked? All of the questions are sending you messages about what's important to the interviewer and to the company. A friend of mine was being interviewed for a VP of HR job. She was working at a place where yelling was commonplace and she wanted to escape.  The CEO asked her if she was aggressive.  Now she could have just said yes (which wasn't true) or she could have said no.  What she said was that she aggressively solved problems but she did that in an assertive, respectful manner because she valued the opinions of others (which was very true).  She got the job and discovered her new employer didn't let people yell in meetings.  Another client told me he kept being asked questions about business development.  That was a bigger issue than the headhunter had said it was.

Only you can decide if you've got no other option but to take an offer from a company that's not your first choice.   Keep your resume up-to-date and continue your search if you do that.  Life's too short and work is too important to our overall satisfaction to stay for long at a place that stinks.

Getting ready for the holidays at work

Happy Advent! We're officially in the preparation for Christmas even though the retail stores would have you believe that preparation started on Nov. 1st.

This is a challenging time for human resources professionals everywhere.  When I was in the corporate universe it was hard to enjoy the holidays at work.  Yes, it can be annoying trying to please everyone in the office but Christians aren't the only people at work and they aren't the only ones who celebrate a holiday in December.

I think one way to manage this time of year at work is to talk with your employees and coworkers about how you'll handle the holidays as a group or how your company plans to handle them.  It's a great way for you all to learn about each others beliefs and get to know each other on a deeper  level.  I think it's also a great opportunity to help people see that Christians can be tolerant and interested in the beliefs of others.

One thing that the holiday season has in common among those who celebrate a holiday at this time is the focus on giving to others.  A way to give to others while not focusing on any one specific holiday is to get involved in a charity in your area or a national or international charity you can all agree on.

You can go to charity navigator to evaluate worthy charities and learn about some that do the kind of work you'd like to support.  Maybe put names in a hat and select the one you'll support.

You could choose a charity that's not religious or is non-denominational like the community foodbank, an environmental organization or an animal support group.

No one is trying to eliminate Christmas as a holiday.  But in today's modern offices we do need to recognize that other people celebrate other holidays around this time and that they're as passionate about their beliefs and special days as we Christians are of ours.  This is a time for us to allow the light of Christ to radiate from us in tolerance and generousity.

How will you celebrate the holidays in your office?